I really need to accept that it’s going to be awhile before our life looks like how we want it to. Nice home, financial security and independence, a garden, a good job for Matthew, the ability to go on our own vacations and make the plans ourselves. We did things all wrong and kind of screwed ourselves so I need to accept that things are going to fall into place later rather then sooner. I really hope this trip we are trying to take for our five year anniversary falls into place. We have never gotten to go anywhere exciting together and on our own terms. I’ll be a little heart broken if it doesn’t work out.

I feel so silly because even though I am having a great time with my family at the beach, I really miss my friends.

I don’t usually go this long without seeing them. I think being around the same people 24/7 makes me cranky.